Five years ago, this man…
And this woman…
Did this…
And then this…
And now five years later, we have these guys…
And now, we are a family of FIVE.
Happy Anniversary, Officer Daddyman. I love you way more than five. I love you 80-90.
I have a t-shirt from Old Navy that says “so red hot” on it, with little hearts inside the letters. I bought it because I liked the pinky-red color (if you haven’t noticed, I like pink) and because it was deeply discounted to $2, since it was leftover from Valentine’s Day. When I bought it, I did a little second guessing about whether the shirt was even appropriate for a 30-something mother of three, but at the end of the day, it’s just a shirt, right? It’s cute and it’s just a shirt.
I was coming out of the Publix today, wearing this shirt, as two guys were walking in. They were probably around 25, looked like the kind of guys who probably have a lot of Korn and Insane Clown Posse on their iPods, were wearing baseball hats, sleeveless shirts, and cutoff jeans, had slightly too long goatees and lots of tattoos, and walked with that swagger those kind of guys often seem to have.
One of the looks at me, coming out of the Publix with my “so red hot” t-shirt and my bags of groceries, kind of shakes his head a little, and says, “No. You’re not.”
I hadn’t said anything to these guys. I had smiled at them a little, because I usually smile at people when I pass them going into or out of a building. I didn’t do anything to invite a comment like this. It was pure, unsolicited meanness.
I know what I am and I know what I look like. I know I don’t look like a supermodel. I’m a tad on the overweight side of things. I’m in my thirties, have three kids, and look it. I am probably a lot more likely to have someone tell me “You look tired” than “You look hot.”
I wasn’t aware that those things were a crime, though. I didn’t know that being those things while wearing a t-shirt with a silly slogan was on par with soliciting an insult. Who on earth raised this man, that he thought it was ok to speak like that to a strange woman, to any woman, to any person? Did someone let him grow up believing that it was his God-given right to insult a woman whose looks don’t meet his idea if “hot” or did he decide that on his own, somewhere along the way? Is he just another product of our woman-objectifying culture*?
I wish I could say I responded wittily or put him in his place or even slapped him across his rude mouth. I didn’t. Instead, I just walked to my car, stung and slightly embarrassed.
*Watch this video if you haven’t seen it before. It’s good.
Take a moment to watch this brilliant animation “Typography” by Ronnie Bruce of a poem by Taylor Mali.
Typography from Ronnie Bruce on Vimeo.
Are you guilty of the “relentless interrogative?” Are your children?
I know that I am going to make a more concerted effort to have my declarative sentences actually declare and to speak with certainty and confidence in my opinions. I don’t want to be a part of a downward slide into inarticulation. Speak with authority so that your children can learn to speak with authority. Let’s model conviction for the next generation.
This is part three in my ongoing series of Building Blocks for Beginners, where I breakdown all the many building systems in a way that only a bored homeschooling mom on summer break can do. If this doesn’t put you at your building system limit, you can read part one (DUPLO and LEGO) and part two (bristle blocks and TRIO). If you have other building systems you’d like to see rates on my uber-scientific scale and put to the rigorous scientific testing of the McLernins Mad Science Laboratory, let me know! We’re always on the lookout for more building toys. Our motto: If you sell, we’ll buy it and build something with it that looks nothing like the example on the box!
Kid K’nex
Ages: 3-7
Kid K’nex, the junior line of the K’nex building system, is a brightly-colored (and I mean brightly colored, lots of neon colors!) system of intersnapping/interlocking brick blocks, wheels, sticks (or “rods”), connectors, and other shapes. The brick blocks are DUPLO-compatible, which means Kid K’nex can extend the life of your DUPLO blocks beyond very early childhood. Most of the pieces are hard plastic, but some are a more flexible plastic, allowing children to build curving shapes. Kid K’nex come in a wide variety of small kits, each with a different them, all usable with each other, which have various vehicle or animal parts. They also have a full line of Sesame Street themed kits. Look for larger sets on Amazon.com or in toy stores, as the website does not show the full line of available products.
Pros: Kid K’nex have a life that lasts far beyond the age recommendations. Tank started playing with the larger Kid K’nex pieces from around age 2 and Captain Science still plays with them frequently at almost 10. Kid K’nex are one of the few toys where the boys will play together peacefully. Most of the pieces are incredibly durable and have held up to 5+ years of regular play. The rods and connectors pack very flat, so you can fit a lot of them into a storage bin. Some sets even come with a hard-sided storage case. The larger pieces are baby-friendly, so even Babypie can “play” Kid K’nex.
Cons: Most of the pieces are sturdy, but a few have not held up well. Certain animal sets come (or came, at least) with flexible foam accent pieces — a lion’s mane with a circus animal/train set, for example. The foam pieces were easily and quickly ripped to shreds. The tiny blue rods are small enough to fit in a baby’s mouth (and possibly to be swallowed) and the next-size-larger short white rods may fit into some babies’ mouths, so these pieces need to be watched carefully around small children. The long, flexible red rods can develop permanent kinks in them after a lot of use. The biggest con, however, is that no matter how many Kid K’nex you have, you will never have enough of them to make sure everyone has enough of whatever piece it is that they want.
Set to buy to get started: Kid K’nex Big Building Tub has a nice assortment of pieces at a low price. The Kid K’nex Education sets are also great.
Ease of use: High
Sturdiness: High
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: Low to Moderate (cull small pieces if used near <2s)
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: Low
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: High
Overall Rating: A+
Tinkertoys
Ages: 3+
The aptly subtitled “classic construction set,” Tinkertoys have been around for almost a hundred years and are still going strong, with only minimal redesigns to the the set, which was (according to Wikipedia) based on “the Pythagorean progressive right triangle.” Available in two materials, the new plastic and the classic wood, with few flashy add-ons (you get fins, you get wheels, and you may get a plastic piece or two that looks like part of a rocket ship), Tinkertoys are the ultimate open-ended building system. The sets are comprised primarily of sticks of various lengths, spool-like connectors, and short end-caps to hold everything together.
Pros: Like Kid K’nex, Tinkertoys have an exceptional creative shelf-life. My boys have happily played with the same set of wooden Tinkertoys for years and will play with them for hours at a time. Tank recently received an all-plastic set, which is splinter proof and as easy to use as the wooden pieces. These toys are built tough and have many possibilities for play. They come in a cylindrical bin for easy storage. The classic wooden sets are great for parents who like to minimize plastic toys. The wooden sets are also very affordable for the number of pieces.
Cons: Because Tinkertoys are so beloved, pieces have walked off over the years, leaving the original set short on a few pieces. Individual pieces aren’t readily available for sale, however, so to replace necessary components, you’ll need to get at least the smallest Mini Set. Though generally durable, the wooden stick can snap, leaving behind a jagged, splintery edge. The plastic pieces don’t snap easily, but don’t grip quite as well as the wooden pieces. The smallest end caps are a choking hazard for small children, so need to be watched carefully or culled if your bigger kids are playing around the smaller ones.
Set to buy to get started: The wooden Tinkertoy Jumbo Builder Set is the best bet. If you prefer plastic, the more expensive 200 piece plastic construction set is the way to go.
Ease of use: High
Sturdiness: Moderate-High
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: Low to Moderate (cull small pieces if used near <2s)
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: Low
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: High
Overall Rating: A
Next Up: Gears!Gears!Gears! and unit blocks
Disclaimer: All curriculum and product reviews here at Smrt Lernins are completely unsolicited and unsponsored. I don’t get money, freebies, or anything else for sharing my opinions about products. I am speaking entirely from personal experience or sharing information publicly available on product websites. If that ever changes, you’ll be the first to know.
Lest you think that homeschooling is a mom-only only, here’s a great big Smrt Learnins shout out to all the fathers who are involved in homeschooling, whether as the primary educator, as a part-time homeschool helper, a single-subject teacher, or just the cheering section for their homeschooling partners.
I don’t know what I’d do without Officer Daddyman’s support. He was the one who first got bitten by the homeschool bug and he was the one who made me believe that we could do this without totally messing up our kids. So far, he’s been right! He helps Captain Science with math, runs a board game class/club for our co-op, engages in the curricula, and even started an account on the Well-Trained Mind Forums. What’s not to love about a homeschooling daddy?
We moms can do it alone if we have to. We can homeschool without the support of a partner if we need to. We’re grateful for the guys in our lives who DO support us, though. Y’all make it easier and a helluvalot more pleasant!
At Smrt Lernins, we think dads (and step-dads and granddads) who love homeschooling are awesome dads!
Tank is concerned about peepee* oil.
He has it on good authority that peepee oil might be covering Mexico and killing people, the fish, dolphins, and sharks. He seems to be the most concerned about the sharks.
He is worried that the peepee oil means we won’t be able to go to the beach again. He’s probably right.
He wants to know if the peepee oil will get into Lake Acworth. I assured him it wasn’t very likely to.
He would like to know how we plan to clean up the peepee oil and how long it will take. I don’t have any answers for him.
Tank is very sad about the peepee oil.
I haven’t shown my children any pictures of the beaches of my childhood, like Gulf Shores, covered with tar balls and pools of BP’s oil. I haven’t shown them the pelicans, the state bird of my birth state, foundering with oil-covered wings. I haven’t shown them dead dolphins being fished out of the Gulf. I have tried to explain that many people will lose their jobs, that many animals will die, and that the Gulf coast may not ever be the same — certainly not in my lifetime, probably not in theirs, and possibly not even in their children’s.
They’re children. To them, time means nothing. They are confident that someone smart will find a way to stop the oil and clean up the mess. With the boundless faith that well-cared-for children have in adults, they believe that they will grow up in a world that is safe, clean, and full of dolphins. That’s what grownups are here for, right?
Right?
*BP
This is part two in a series of reviews of pretty much every building system I can think of…and believe me, I can think of a lot of them. Don’t forget to go back and read part one (DUPLO and LEGO).
Bristle Blocks
Ages 18m+
Not a specific brand, but a description of a type of block produced by several manufacturers. These brightly colored plastic blocks are covered with (you guessed it) bristles that allow the blocks to stick together like Velcro. They’re lightweight for their size and come in a fairly limited number of shapes. They’re also sold under the brand name Krinkles.
Pros: Because any piece will stick to any other piece from almost any direction, these blocks are exceptionally easy for children who haven’t yet mastered those fine motor skills. They’re also the elusive “blocks for babies” that people seem to be looking for, with no small or sharp pieces. Even very young children can easily build tall towers with these blocks. A revival in popularity has led to bristle-compatible add-ons, such as people, wheels, and spinners, all of which stick to the bristle blocks. While these aren’t my children’s go-to blocks, they get pulled out with some degree of regularity and have for several years.
Cons: If you have a biter/chewer, you may end up with de-bristled bristle blocks. The little tines are fairly easy for a dedicated (and sharp-toothed) toddler to nip off. Though structures with flat-stacked blocks are nigh indestructible, bristle blocks stacked on their edges tend to fall apart too easily, which can lead to child frustration.
Set to buy to get started: Parents Bristle Blocks Basic (pricey) or Krinkles 50 Piece Set (cheap)
Ease of use: High
Sturdiness: Moderate
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: Low
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: Surprisingly Low
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: Moderate
Overall Rating: B
TRIO Building System
Ages 3-5
Plastic cube-shaped bricks that snap together easily. Rather than external pegs (like LEGO and DUPLO), TRIO blocks connect end to end with a slightly recessed top edge in multiple directions with short straight or curved sticks. Some sets include triangular fins/wings, eyeballs on stick stalks, and figurines. There are also several themed sets (DC comics, castle, and police are a few examples).
Pros: These blocks do snap together easily. The directions accompanying each set are simple enough for a child to follow. Tank was able figure out which pieces were needed to assemble the various critters in the Crazy Creatures set. The resulting creatures are very cute. The price is also right — just $10 for a 54-piece set!
Cons: Unfortunately, these pieces snap apart as easily as they snap together. Any pressure on the structure (adding an additional piece on top) can send the whole thing crashing down. Frustration and tantrums follow. Though the blocks go together easily, the sticks don’t snap into the blocks evenly unless you insert them just right, which usually requires an adult. We ended up putting these blocks away after two days of use, because we were tired of Tank’s exasperated hollering.
Set to start with: Crazy Creatures if you just want a sample or TRIO Building Set with Storage if you want a full starter kit.
Ease of use: Moderate
Sturdiness: Low
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: Low
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: Low-Moderate
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: Low
Overall Rating: D
Next up: Kid K’nex and that oldie, but goodie, Tinker Toys
Disclaimer: All curriculum and product reviews here at Smrt Lernins are completely unsolicited and unsponsored. I don’t get money, freebies, or anything else for sharing my opinions about products. I am speaking entirely from personal experience or sharing information publicly available on product websites. If that ever changes, you’ll be the first to know.
Now that we have celebrated Tank’s 4th birthday, with all of the gift opening, I think we now own every block-, brick-, or stick-based building system known to man child. The following is the first in a series of reviews of our various building systems for your building system buying pleasure.
DUPLO
Ages: 1 1/2+
DUPLO, or “those giant LEGOS” as we like to call them, are essentially Baby’s First Building system. Sets come in a wide array of prices and sizes. DUPLOS are bright primary colors, have all the standard LEGO shapes writ large, and are also available in multiple themed/character sets, with wheels, figurines, architectural add-ons (windows and doors), and other accessories that can snap to the blocks.
Pros: Giant blocks fit easily into toddler hands, snap together easily, and come apart with minimal adult help required. The structures they build won’t fall over or fall apart. The pieces are too large to fit easily into small mouths. These blocks will likely survive a nuclear blast.
Cons: DUPLO blocks take up a lot of storage space due to their size and shape(s) and didn’t remain favorites in our house for very long once other building systems were introduced. There’s also something about the noise they make when they clack together in a container that absolutely grates on my nerves.
Set to buy to get started: DUPLO Large Brick Box
Ease of use: High
Sturdiness: High
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: Low
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: Moderate
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: Low
Overall Rating: B-
LEGO
Ages: 4+
LEGO is the gold standard of building systems, the one building toy that nearly every child in the world will recognize. Its iconic blocks-with-prongs shape has been often imitated, but I’ve yet to find a product that has improved on that design. It has product tie-ins to nearly every television show and movie, plus multiple original lines, but at the end of the day, it’s the plain old snapping block that has won our hearts.
Pros: A box of LEGOs provides endless possibilities that will entertain my children for, quite literally, hours at a time. They are one of the few toys that both children can play with together in relative peace and quiet (as long as enough LEGOs are available and no one needs to dispute ownership of specific pieces). Ignore all the fancy-pants sets and you have a fantastic open-ended, low tech toy with years of entertainment value. Easy to store, too!
Cons: Tiny plastic blocks and babies/small toddlers don’t mix. I’ve fished many a LEGO from Babypie’s mouth, not to mention out of a/c vents, drains, crevices of furniture, etc. Basic block sets can be difficult to find in stores, which seem to favor the themed building sets and step-by-step “build this one product” sets — BORING! LEGO is occasionally guilty of unnecessary genderizing — were a blue box set (with wheels) and a pink box set (with horsies and house parts) really necessary? Couldn’t one large set have included both?
Set to buy to get started: LEGO Large Brick Box
Ease of use: Low to Moderate (depending on set)
Sturdiness: Moderate to High (depending on set)
Likelihood of being swallowed/choked on by younger siblings: High
Degree of pain when stepped on by a parent: High
Period of time spent as “favorite toy ever!”: High
Overall Rating: A
Next up: TRIO Building System and Bristle Blocks
Disclaimer: All curriculum and product reviews here at Smrt Lernins are completely unsolicited and unsponsored. I don’t get money, freebies, or anything else for sharing my opinions about products. I am speaking entirely from personal experience or sharing information publicly available on product websites. If that ever changes, you’ll be the first to know.
Patchfire’s post about honest reporting (about your children and yourself) reminded me that one of the requirements for homeschooling in Georgia is that I must write an annual summary or report on what we covered this year and on Captain S’s progress. They can’t require that I give them these reports, but I have to write them and then hang on to them for three years. Record-keeping isn’t my area of supreme excellence, of course, but that’s where the blog will come in handy. All I have to do is refer back to my weeks and weeks of Weekly Reviewins and voila! I shall have all the information I could possible require!
All the information on Captain Science that I could possibly require, that is.
Captain Science isn’t the only one who started homeschooling this year. This year, as my blog subtitle indicates, has also been an educational process for me. No one requires any sort of report on what I’ve learned, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t take the time to assess it. So, what has Smrt Mama McLernins learned about homeschooling (and herself) this year? What did I learn about being a secular classical homeschooler?
1. Color-coded schedules: what works and what doesn’t. Our color-coded schedule was a great idea in theory, but didn’t work out so well in execution. Too tightly scheduled, not enough time for transitions, and not enough flexibility for Captain Science. He needs more control over his order of activities. Next year’s schedule will still be time-blocked, because that really does help us get through our day in a timely manner, but it will be color coded into “core subjects,” “electives,” etc. and Captain Science will be able to choose the order in which he does his work, and more transitional time will be provided. For example, on Mondays we’d have three one-hour blocks for “school work,” separated by 15 minute breaks, followed by a half-hour lunch, another one hour block of work, then piano. Tank’s schedule would be broken up more and be in shorter blocks, with synced lunches.
2. We had an unacceptable dearth of hands-on stuff. We did so little of this and I really regret that. Projects, crafts, etc. need to be pre-planned and scheduled into our week. Other than writing samples, we have very little to physically show for our school year. No fridge art, no dioramas or whatever to display. This simply will not fly, especially next year, when my artsy little Tank is homeschooling with us. We need specifically blocked-out times for arts and crafts and we need to integrate a physical component into our history lessons. I don’t think we need to make sugar cube pyramids or anything like that, but we do need to find some more hands-on methods of doing lessons.
3. Captain Science owns his work, not me. I am one damn impatient woman. Impatient for Captain Science to get through his work quickly, impatient for him to do it the right way the first time, impatient for him to put in maximum effort rather than half-assing it. On Dawdlin’ Days, it’s all I can do to not just scream “OH MY GOD, just finish your dang WORK already!” at him, whilst running around and tearing at my hair and possibly taking up chain smoking. Ultimately, I’m not the one who controls how quickly he finishes the work. I’m not the one who controls how well he finishes the work. I can set time limits and repercussions for violating those limits. I can set standards for the work and have him redo it when he doesn’t meet those standards. At the end of the day, though, I can’t make him do something in a timely manner or with a high level of quality…or at all. Deep breath. Release. Provide guidance. Provide boundaries. Provide repercussions. Trust him.
4. Broad but shallow or narrow but deep? Did we spend too little time on each of too many subjects at a time? Did we spend too much time on too few subjects? Officer Daddyman and I have discussed this and in looking back over the past year, I see that we had periods of both. We started out with too much focus on history. It dominated our day, our life, our house! While classical homeschooling is typically history-centric, we were sacrificing other subjects just to drag out history. We also had a point where we were trying to cover 6+ subjects in a day, which meant that we couldn’t put any quality time into each subject. One way we dealt with this was by streamlining the subjects. For example, instead of three or four small language arts segments covering different things (grammar, vocabulary, writing), we switched to Michael Clay Thompson’s language arts curriculum, which integrated or coordinated those areas.
5. What’s popular isn’t always right, but it sometimes is. I probably won’t be buying into Sonlight or Math U See any time soon, no matter how many people sing their praises, but I wish I’d listened to the other parents on the advanced learner/gifted forum sooner. I know that I initially scoffed at how everyone was jumping on board the MCT train…oh, aren’t they trendy? Then I saw a video of Mr. Thompson talking about giftedness and why/how it should be nurtured, and I realized that his curriculum wasn’t popular because it was trendy, but because he had really clued in to some essential elements of giftedness. What other curricula have I dismissed due to its popularity that, in retrospect, I might discover could be a great fit for us. I won’t let a curriculum’s popularity/trendiness keep me from checking it out.
6. Friends in unlikely places. I thought that I’d find my home in the secular homeschooling community. As my many posts about feeling alienated or out of place would indicate, this wasn’t the case. I did, to my surprise, find some wonderful friends in the Christian homeschooling community. Despite vast differences in our personal lives, our specific academic materials, and our spiritual/philosophical beliefs, the many things we do share has given me a true sense of community. I also thought that it would be in the academic homeschooling community that I’d make my friends, but I could several unschoolers among the ranks of my Sisters in Homeschooling. I can’t even list all the wonderful (mostly) women (and a few men) I have encountered in the homeschool community…from all walks of life. In the end, it’s hasn’t been about secular or Christian, classical or unschooling, but about commonality of humor, respect for each other and our children, and a belief that we each want to do what is best for our children. If we don’t have humor as parents and homeschoolers, what do we have?
7. It’s ok to quit the stuff that isn’t working (before you hit crisis/loathing stage). A curriculum isn’t a marriage, right? I’ve had to learn and relearn this one. In October, I wrote about how much we loved Writing Strands and by January, I was writing about how much I disliked it. How many months of that time in between did I force us to keep on with an increasingly incompatible curriculum? I don’t know for sure, but next year, I will give myself permission to quite before I have to write a big dramatic post about how much I hate said curriculum. I promise. This time, I really will.
8. I don’t totally suck at this. Captain Science learned a lot this year. I learned a lot this year. We still like each other. Daddyman and I still like each other. The world hasn’t collapsed, the house hasn’t burned down, and I haven’t had a nervous breakdown. We not only can do this, we ARE doing this! We’re really, truly homeschoolers…and we’re doing just fine.
