Secular Thursday: From the other side — a religious homeschooler weighs in
[Note from Smrt Mama: My dear friend The Mama from Concordia Classical Academy is doing me a very special Secular Thursday favor by guest blogging this wonderful post about how religious homeschoolers view secular homeschooling. I hope you'll appreciate her unique insight into the differences between our worlds as much as I do.]
Most of you regular Smrt Mama readers don’t know me, so let me first introduce myself. I’m the Mama, mother of three children: Sweet Pea, 6, Little Bird, almost 3, and Moose, 7 weeks. My elder two are girls and the baby is our first boy.
I live in the northern part of Minnesota in a little town that isn’t near very much. Except woods. Remember reading Little House in the Big Woods where Laura Ingalls Wilder talks about woods that go for days without end? It’s like that, only not in Wisconsin. Anyway, besides the children which quasi-qualify me to blather on about homeschooling, I am part of a family that fits neatly into the religious category: I’m married to a conservative pastor, we lead a pretty traditional family life, we dress modestly, and we teach religion as part of our day. I’m probably the stereotype that you now can picture in your mind! Smrt Mama told me that it’d be interesting to see how religious homeschoolers view the others–the seculars. I decided to take it upon myself to speak for a diverse, divergent community, so here it goes!*
Social graces
Since the most common question homeschoolers seem to get pounded with by others is about the s-word (socialization, or the lack thereof) I thought I’d start with how we religious folk view this. You may have noticed the plethora of religious homeschooling groups and co-ops, many of which require a member to sign a belief statement to get into the club. Why? Why keep out people who don’t agree? There’s some differing viewpoints here, and I’ll try to hit on those that come to mind:
Book Learning
When it comes to science, there are three main groups: Those who believe the world was created in about a week, roughly 6,000 years ago, those who believe evolution and creation co-exist in intelligent design, and those who believed this all evolved over a massive amount of time. There’s even debate, from all sides, if all of these views are science, so it’s no surprise that this is an area that there’s some big disagreements. Most religious homeschoolers kind of shake their heads at secular science and how prevalent it is. Some even have apologetics–defense of the faith–as a part of science class or its own subject.
Relaxation and rigor: it’s probably untrue, but there’s a big feeling that some seculars are way too loosey goosey with academics. And that eventually this’ll negatively impact homeschooling for everybody.
The Future
Goods news, though: despite the worries about your kids cohabiting and living free and easy, I do think most religious homeschoolers think secularly homeschooled kids will shake out better then their publically schooled peers.
I will say that most of my current homeschool chattering is with secular folks who’ve chosen a similar academic path for their schooling. By circumstance, most of my friends are of a reiligious bent similar to my own. I think both groups could have a lot to share…if we could all just play nice in the sand box. And, you know, do things my way. 
*I know there are religious homeschoolers who share none of my viewpoints or are deeply offended by my sentiments here. To you: I am deeply, sincerely sorry!
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[...] I think it provides a nice point of discussion for Secular Thursday. You can also read The Mama's previous guest post on a religious homeschooler's perspective of secular [...]
I totally agree with the social graces section. That really is what it boils down to; shelter, fear, anger, and peace. Great post.
I think with book learning you face a varied response to secular homeschoolers.
Anti-intellectuals will view secular homeschoolers and christian homeschoolers who use a rigorous approach as too focused on academics and not focused on character.
Ultra conservatives (the God, guns, and homeschooling crowd) will often view secular homeschoolers as extreme liberals who are causing the demise of their great “christian” country. These are the homeschoolers who break down M-4 rifles as their home school fair demonstration.
School-in-a-box homeschoolers will view secular unschoolers as grossly neglectful in their God-given parenting duties & who allow their children to be influenced by anything and everything.
Holy cow (or maybe unholy cow), if a secular tries to get along in an anti-intellectual school-in-a-box ultra conservative christian home school group. Well, I’m feeling for you.
She’s a smart lady, The Mama. While she confirms some of my suspicions about what some of the more conservative homeschoolers might think about people like me, she also reassures me that there might be hope for a middle ground, at least in public forums like WTM. If people like you and The Mama can get along with people like me and Patchfire, isn’t there hope for everyone, if we can all treat each other like individuals, not like parts of a group we dislike?
“God, guns, and homeschooling”
I think that the loud voices in this group are one reason why secular homeschoolers have an equally negative opinion (on the whole, not as individuals) about religious homeschooling.
Nearly three years ago, I moved from the heart of the Midwest, homeschooling alongside the ultra conservatives (where I didn’t fit) to the West Coast. When we first moved, I found two groups of homeschoolers– one in the ultra conservative and the other being secular homeschoolers with a strong unschooling bent (also a bad fit for me).
It’s encouraging to know that there’s a middle-ground, even if it’s just online.
I just wish I could relocate my growing middle-ground community to one place.
See, I’m a weird fence straddler. I’m a Christian. When we can, we go to church (health reasons, not politics or laziness); we have been active in the past (before my current health disaster), but I’m not part of the crowd that believes the Bible is inerrant or that intelligent design or creationism are verifiable ideas.
We don’t homeschool for religious reasons; we homeschool for academic reasons. My kid is doing first grade work. He’s 4 1/2. I think you can see the problem unleashing him on an unsuspecting public school system. I also know that the way he learns is incompatible with a normal classroom; I’m a college professor, I *know* what I’m talking about here. So, we homeschool; let him guide how much he does on a given day, and we don’t worry about it.
And trust me when I say, I barely fit in anywhere. It’s quite a head meet desk moment. Sigh.
Unless you adhere to a strictly religious curricula or you’re a self-described unschooler, there’s really NOT a place to fit in.
A lot of “secular” homeschoolers are still religious or spiritual individuals, but homeschool for reasons other than religious ones and don’t use a religious curriculum.
Agreed. I thought I’d fit in with the WTM crowd (at least somewhat), but I don’t even fit there. Very disheartening.
My mind boggles at the thought of using a religious curriculum (well, that and I get all freaked out because that’s so not my bag).
Can I put a good word in for families who are religious, but don’t homeschool for religious reasons? I think there are more in this group than people realize. We think homeschool only groups are silly when there are already perfectly fine community groups for things like sports, community theater, or scouts. Our kids go to church, and pray, but not during science class. We’re not scared of Darwin, or Martin Luther, or Easter, or a naked Rodin.
To sum it up in just a few words. Not everyone who happens to go to church and homeschools is a religious homeschooler. There are more of us out there than you think.
Right there with you.
I agree wholeheartedly. I’ve written about the misconception that “secular homeschooling” means the family is atheist and Patchfire has written about the different definitions of “secular”.
I guess I appreciate the effort to include such a large group of people in the ’secular’ homeschooler group, but I don’t think the term fits.
Ask 100% what a secular homeschooler is, and I bet 95 of them say not religious. If you constantly have to explain the meaning of a term, it might be time for a different term.
FWIW, we call ourselves academic homeschoolers, since that is our primary motivation.
Along those same lines, someone who homeschools for religious reasons in San Francisco might be 180 degrees from someone who homeschools for religious reasons in Dallas
To add to that – I call myself Christopagan or very very liberal Christian. If I ever go to an institutional church again (and I do so miss the ritual!), it will likely be UCC or Episcopal. I’m terrified of what these liberal congregations will think when they find out that I homeschool. I have a feeling they’ll think I’m too conservative for them!
Eh, the Episcopal church welcomes you
. That’s what our signs say and, generally speaking, we really do mean it. Just be wary in certain places (the ones with the ex-bishops leading supposedly Episcopal churches that are now calling themselves Anglican churches, etc., etc.).
I don’t know that anyone at the church knows I’m homeschooling. Then again, I’m not sure most of them realize we’re still members.
Hey, Kash, if the Unitarians can handle it, I’m pretty sure UCC can. There are actually UU homeschool blogs and a UU homeschooler yahoo group. We don’t homeschool for religious reasons, but we probably weave more of our faith into our homeschool than we’d have thought to if we hadn’t had so many examples of CCs doing it.