Smrt Lernins

Ariana asks, “How you deal with homeschooling the oldest while still caring for the two younger?”

I’ve written previously about my decision to put the Tank in a traditional preschool. I have arranged our two most rigorous curricula days to fall on two of the days he’s at preschool. Our away-from-home science lab is on the third day of preschool. This allows us to accomplish a lot while the Tank has a nice playdate. On days he is home, distraction is helpful. Sometimes he’ll do “table lernins,” working in a workbook or coloring book while Captain Science and I do school work. Sometimes I set him up with a snack and/or a movie. Sometimes he comes in and out incessantly, bothering us, until I snap at him and send him to his room. You never really know what to expect!

Babypie is a distraction for Captain Science. He loves her so much that it’s hard to keep him on task. Separation to another room (for him), frequent reminders to stay on task, or trying to arrange her nursing and napping time to coincide with his more important work all help. As she has gotten older, she’s shown a remarkable ability to self-entertain, playing alone with her toys for 20-30 minutes, easily. All I have to do is keep her away from the stairs and Christmas tree!

If we decide to home “preschool” the Tank next year, we’ll have to find some methods to keep both of the boys on task, especially with a busy toddler underfoot, but that’s a bridge we’ll cross when we come to it.

She ask wonders, “When, if ever, do you get time for yourself? Has what you choose to do with that time changed at all?”

I definitely have less “me time” than I used to. When Captain Science was in public school, I could be guaranteed at least an hour of quiet while the Tank napped. Now, it’s a crap shoot as to whether I get any quiet at all. On the plus side, Captain Science is old enough to be trusted with Babypie while I cook dinner…or use the potty in blessed peace and solitude. Trust me, with three children, making a tinkle without a pottience is me time, homeschool or no homeschool.

Officer Daddyman tries to make sure I get enough time to myself, but that’s hard to achieve. Someone always wants me, and Daddyman suffers from a distinct lack of ninnies for nursing a fussy baby back to sleep. Once a week, we go over to Patchfire’s place, and she and I head out for frozen cutard at Rita’s, leaving the kids with the daddies. That’s a nice little respite, however brief. Sneaking up to have a hot bath and a book (sometimes with a glass of wine) is a nice little luxury in which I indulge a few nights a week, though normally after the kids are asleep.

I definitely appreciate my “me time” more now, but I haven’t made any significant changes to how I use it. I’ve grown a lot closer with Patchfire, due to our bond over homeschooling, so I see more of her and her family than I used to, but I still enjoy the same things — reading, knitting, playing Pet Society on Facebook, watching a little mindless television (on Hulu or Netflix), playing a little Wii on occasion, and spending time with family and friends. An hour out with the girls is practically a panacea for mama-stress!

That’s how a [Smrt] Homeschooler balances time with all her kids…and still sneaks a little in for herself.

Do you have a question to ask a [Smrt] Homeschooler? Email them to smrtmama@smrtlernins.com!

I don’t usually “mix causes” (as La Leche League calls it, speaking of causes) on this blog. I tend to keep it relatively topical. When it comes to this topic, however, I think it’s time to speak up.

I feel strongly about the importance, nay, the necessity of breastfeeding. I have breastfed all three of my children, including Babypie, who is still going strong at 8 1/2 months. In fact, my cumulative time spent breastfeeding is over five years at this point! I’ve overcome a handful of struggles, but mostly, my path to breastfeeding has been pretty easy. I grew up in a family where breastfeeding was just how you fed your babies. I never considered any other way. I have birthed and raised my children surrounded by people who believe babies should be breastfed, and that support has allowed me to feed my children in the way nature (and, if you’re religiously minded, God) intended. Breastfeeding your children is a physiologically, biologically, psychologically normal thing to do. In breast milk are the keys to unlocking many aspects of the body’s normal growth and development. Why would I do anything else, short of dire medical necessity?

Not every woman has the support I had. Many of them are raised in formula-normative homes and know little about breastfeeding. Misconceptions, social pressure, and outright lies persist. Husbands, family, and friends put pressure on women to stop breastfeeding early, or to not start at all. Women pass misinformation along to each other. Doctors and nurses are woefully ignorant about the realities of how human lactation works. Formula companies have millions and millions of dollars to dump into advertising. They have, successfully, waged a campaign devoted to making breastfeeding seem irrelevant, frumpy, vaguely primitive, and somewhat shameful and embarrassing (make sure you cover up with one of those tents “hooter hiders”). On the other hand, breastfeeding doesn’t exactly have corporate sponsorship. There’s very little money to be made off successful breastfeeding, beyond pumps for working moms (usually a one time purchase) and a few inexpensive fripperies that can make breastfeeding a little more convenient, but aren’t at all necessary for most women. Breastfeeding isn’t big business with big businesses ad budget.

That’s why I’m here today stumping for the Best for Babes Foundation, a non-profit organization that is devoted to changing the perception of breastfeeding. They want to “market, brand, and mainstream” breastfeeding as something that is healthy, empowering, normal, and even hip. They do this through educating women about institutional and cultural “booby traps”, offering positive images of breastfeeding role-models (no frumps stuck at home wearing oversized button-up shirts here!), tips on finding breastfeeding-supportive care providers, and more. They also very honestly acknowledge the potential pitfalls of an advertising campaign for breastfeeding.

I’m trying to do my part, through spreading the word, and you can help, too. On the right hand side of Smrt Lernins, you’ll see a little rectangular box advertising Best for Babes. Click on that box (or on this link) and you’ll be take to a page explaining how you can help Best for Babes run its ad campaign. You can also follow @BestforBabes on Twitter and join their cause on Facebook. While you’re at it, why not check out the awesome website, PhD in Parenting, a supporter of Best for Babes and a great resource for parents.

Now back to your regularly scheduled smrt lernins.